Bananas in the Caribbean

So I've been back from vacation for over a week now and there's definitely some things I already miss.

We had sunlight on the sand. We had moonlight on the Sea.
We had mangoes and bananas you could pick right off the buffet tables...

And those bananas are what I miss. Instead of ripping them off while they're green so that they could ripen in a warehouse, they ripened on the trees until they were needed for your breakfast cereal! Fresh and delicious.

I wanted to stuff my pockets with them and bring them home with me!
There were, of course, three problems with doing this.

First, the practical problem: it would be quite messy.

Second, the legal problem: you can't take produce off the island and back to the U.S.

And third, and most importantly, the folks at the resort have seen it all. They have witnessed plenty of bizarre behavior and are absolutely unfazed by the antics of their guests. so no matter how much you may want it, you will not get a barmaid or hostess to ask, "Excuse me, sir. Is that a banana in your pocket?"

Kind of makes it just not worth it.